A Quick Ambush of Anger

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Do you ever think of love as silly thing?

Or is it just me being more pessimistic about love (more than ever)?

This kind of anger just bursts out after my friend told me about that guy—my secret admirer, about the reason why he likes me. It turns out that I look like the girl he liked back then.

So, I have nothing special, huh?

I am just an objection for his lost love!

It is not that I am sad or broken after knowing the truth. But it is true that I am disappointed. I am just thinking has love ever been a pure one (or normal, in my case)? Or is it just me who never lucky enough to have it?
Somehow this crazy thoughts force a grin in my face. Now it reminds me of my (ehm, nearly) sociopath Persian friend who seems to see love as a chance of having great sex. And this spoiled Pinoy, crazy about me whom he only knows through internet, yet he is famous at his place and damn lucky to have girls (also gays, that is scary by the way) fight over him. They are all insane, Man! Yeah, at least insane in my most sane perspective.

Now, the most important questions rise:

When will I get the chance to find my true, pure (and normal, of course) one? And who is that guy who will bring me infinite joy?

Deep in my heart, I am scared that I would never do. Or, have I actually met that guy?

Who, who will give me the understanding that I am wrong to think that love is a silly thing?

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