Review: A Lover’s Discourse: Fragments

PicsArt_04-02-03.09.14Okay, the truth is I haven’t even finished this book yet (baru 150-an dari total 241 halaman). Namun, aku sudah nggak sabar untuk share pengalamanku membaca buku ini. Lagipula aku khawatir kalau ditunda lagi malah keburu hilang feel-nya. sad

For your info I’ve been struggling to finish this book alongside Cosmos (Carl Sagan) for months! Keduanya adalah buku yang tergolong sulit for sure. Bayangkan aja aku ngebut baca Cosmos yang berbahasa Indonesia tapi tebalnya 400-an halaman (jangan lupa ini buku nonfiksi ilmiah!) bersama A Lover’s Discourse yang berbahasa Inggris dan ‘rumit’ (meski cuma 200-an halaman). Padahal aku udah sok gitu di Goodreads ikut Reading Challenge mau menuhi 20 buku tahun ini. Tampaknya sudah 3 bulan lebih waktuku habis cuma buat baca dua buku tersebut hahaha rolling on the floor

Sudah lama aku gregetan kepengen baca A Lover’s Discourse: Fragments karya Roland Barthes ini. Siapakah Roland Barthes? Menurut Wikipedia, doi adalah French literary theorist, philosopher, linguist, critic, and semiotician (why there are so many modern linguist/theorist/philosopher from France? thinking). Aku lupa pertama tahu buku ini dari mana, sepertinya sih dari suggestion di Goodreads deh. Aku lihat buku ini punya rating tinggi, user review yang bagus, juga background tulisan yang menarik. Pada saat itu aku sedang tertarik baca buku yang membahas tentang cinta, tapi bukan cinta versi teenlit dan chiclit (aku kurang doyan juga lagian laughing). Itulah sebabnya aku semangat banget pergi ke IIBF 2016 kemarin untuk mencari buku keluaran tahun 1978 ini… Sayangnya nggak ketemu meski mas favoritku sudah ngacak-ngacak buku import di stand orang hahaha. At last aku baca pdf-nya yang berbahasa inggris deh (bahkan ebook gratisan pun nggak nemu di internet!). Continue reading

Hello, I’ve Missed You (LOL) (Random Post)

Nah, I’m kidding. I don’t really miss this blog tongue. I’m at the moment where I get really bored with one thing so I do other thing(s) instead. In this case: 1. I was not in the mood for blogging 2. I have had personal issues (responsibility, dealing with anger, mild depression, and social anxiety—I feel better now though) 3. I have to focus on other serious long term project 4. I have to read both Cosmos (Carl Sagan) and A Lover’s Discourse: Fragments (Roland Barthes) concurrently in my free time 5. I was just being a procrastinating INTP, what else could it be? rolling on the floor

Actually, I’ve listed down some posts that I plan to write. Lots of them. Movie reviews. New Recipes. Book reviews. Arggghhh they drive me crazy that I want to get rid of them from my to-do list (but I shouldn’t!). Sooo I decided to relax a bit and write more about ME (as remedy, I could be pretty “sick” at times, you know). I’d like to talk about random abstract things, my ideas, my past, my dreams, or just shitty posts to let go of my overwhelming thoughts (and sometimes, emotion too, Honey kiss). I have to remind myself that I should not stress myself intentionally—I should be happy whenever I’m writing! happy

Also, I’ve decided to write in English now (except for review posts). I realized 90% of my followers and readers aren’t from Indonesia. For me it is kind of upsetting if my writing goes for nothing. And since it’s decided that I am going to let people take a glimpse into my life, I better not write them in Bahasa Indonesia (I don’t feel good writing something personal/emotion-draining posts—it makes me feel exposed and stupid. English makes it better because my people would be less interested to read it xD).

So, I’ll work harder to provide good posts from now on! I hope you’ll still enjoy my blog even with the upcoming changes sad. See you later guys and gurls! *hugsandkisses *sorrymyenglishissobadthistime




A Way to Decipher True Love


(Note: I should have posted this one on Valentine’s day but I was lazy af to finish it LOL)

Love is undeniably an interesting subject. Even for me—a rather skeptic heartless Thinker, Love has made it way beside Time and Fate (Universe/Cosmos, whatever you call it) as biggest mysteries in my life. So, even though I am really sucks at social life (even more in romantic relationship, I don’t usually consider it important in my life), the concept of Love in general is always able to aroused my curiosity. day dreaming

So, what is True Love? What does it stand for? For all my life, I had born with the saying in my religion that we—humans are born in pairs. I’d like to comment that it has two major impacts among my people: Continue reading

Homemade Onion Ring(s)!


Oke guys gurls, kali ini aku mau share cara bikin onion ring sendiri di rumah. Namun perlu diingat bahwa resep ini adalah murni hasil nyontek yang dikreasikan (dan baru dicoba dua kali), jadi keenakan resep ini belum lah valid (dan aku nggak tau rasa onion ring yang asli jadi nggak bisa bandingin LOL blush crazy rabbit). Nah, makanya aku harus buru-buru tulis di sini sebelum lupa bahan dan caranya hahaha. Continue reading

Review: Kumpulan Film Ghibli yang Kurang Populer (Recommended!) (Part 1)

Akhir-akhir ini nama Makoto Shinkai sedang naik daun berkat kesuksesan film karyanya, Kimi No Nawa (Your Name). Saking melejitnya, nama beliau sering dibanding-bandingkan dengan Hayao Miyazaki; bahkan banyak yang mengagungkan (baca: mendewakan) Shinkai-sensei dengan membuat artikel atau berpendapat kalau Kimi No Nawa lebih bagus dari Spirited Away-nya Miyazaki-sensei. Hal ini lumayan menggangguku no talking sebab: 1. Menurutku Kimi No Nawa itu excellent, but lacking the story (too mediocre) sehingga tidak membekas di hati—belum pantas disandingkan dengan film bikinan Ghibli 2. Orang-orang selalu mengaitkan Ghibli dengan Miyazaki, seakan Takahata dan juga director lainnya hanyalah butiran debu d'oh 3. Film bikinan Ghibli bukan cuma Spirited Away, My Neighbour Totoro, dan Grave of Fireflies! Duh, aku sayang kalian semua. calm down crazy rabbit

Karena sebab-sebab di ataslah aku memutuskan untuk merangkum film-film Ghibli yang kurang populer dalam sebuah list. Supaya referensi kalian soal film Ghibli lebih luas gitu. smug Continue reading

Infinite Loop of Anxiety and Depression

Yeah, today without any rational reasons, I couldn’t hold back my tears anymore. Well, there WERE reasons though, but I hate to admit it. Today everything was okay. I talked to some friends, had a nostalgic vibe from them—felt encouraged and cheered. I even thought all day about some recipe that I’m going to try tomorrow.

It just happened. I cried at night. It was a long and silent one. Yeah, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed these past few days—even worse than last year (which I considered as the worst year ever since I was having nonstop anxiety and depression for losing myself and my loved ones). And the absence (ignorance) of my Aviator only extended my tears. Yeah, I know I sound whiny writing all these teary things; in fact that’s the reason I always stop myself from writing emotionally even when I need to.

I know I’ve always overthinking things ahead; it’s not easy to stop thinking (you may never know this unless you’re also an INTP). I had people telling me to stop thinking for once. But this is how I work. I have a lot of going in my mind more than you think I do. I’m both pessimistic and a foolish. Even writing this embarrassed me. I know I should have stop worrying things and act instead.

But how should I act? Even today I’m still torn between my dreams and the realistic life I live in. How if I follow my intuition but end up regretting my decision because I ignore what society told (pushed) me?

I hate the fucking society. I hate the world (not the earth and its whole magnificent nature within it—it’s the destructive human that I can’t stand).

And I hate myself the most. How could one bear this broken-hollowed soul, I’ll never know.